Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Plugging along

I'll be honest, I've tried to write a new post quite a few times & struggled to get through it. A few days after my last post about sweet Ruby Jane she returned home to her Heavenly Father. She was brave & strong & held on as long as she could, but her time had come & her parents knew it was time for her to go home. I'm still fighting back tears as I write this . . . which is why I've put it off for so long. Let me just say what I've learned through seeing this family go through this experience. I was taking my kids & the time I get to spend with them for granted. Life is precious & you never know what's around the next turn. Time goes by so quickly & I'm trying to think more about how I spend it & what kind of memories I want to have of this period of life. Will it be a flurry of tending to little kids wants & needs or will I remember frequent moments I stopped doing what I thought "needed" to be done & just slowed down with my kids? I'm still working on this, but it is on my mind constantly & I try to do better each day. I'm also so grateful to know that I can be with my family forever after this life, but I need to do my part & live worthy of that blessing. How different a feeling the death of a loved one becomes when we know that instead of being goodbye forever, it's simply a separation of time & we can be with them again. This doesn't take away the hurt, grief, & sadness we feel as we long for & miss our loved ones, but what a comfort to know that we will be reunited again after this life! I have been forever changed by this experience & little Ruby's influence is felt on in many hearts, but definitely in my family's. I was able to attend the celebration service they held for Ruby & was amazed by the experience. While we went intending to offer support & love, it was us who received the comfort, strength & support. I have never been more impressed by a family in their time of loss, it was something I will never forget. I hope you will continue to pray with me for this family, that their hearts will be comforted & they will feel of our love & support.

Now I'll share a few fun things going on around our house lately. Troy started a Tiny Tots preschool program & has LOVED it! I knew he would, I was the one hesitating letting go of my first born, but he's doing great. He was a little hesitant the very first day (which I was totally fine with), but has made friends, likes his teachers & looks forward to it. And since it's only 6 hours a week I'm doing ok too, haha!

Miss Lexie turned a year and a 1/2 and got to start going to nursery at church. Again I was a little nervous to let her take a "big girl"step, not knowing how she'd do, but our little independent love was totally fine. We walked her in, she went straight to the toys & never looked back! As a matter of fact her second week there she didn't even want to leave when it was over. She is too funny! Ever since she started walking months ago her personality has emerged & there's been no turning back. She lets you know what she wants (often involving food), & loves being with her big brother all the time. She runs with this bounce in her step that's hilarious, which makes her look like she's going much faster than she is & has been repeating tons of words lately, it's only a matter of time, yikes! She's definitely in the exploring stage, where she finds things around the house that aren't exactly my favorite "play things" & she likes to show she's in charge & makes you work to have her come when you call her. But she's still our sweet cuddle bug & after she wakes up will completely relax & cuddle with you for quite some time, so we love that!

Lastly we're excited to welcome baby #3 to our family this coming April 4th. I'm grateful for the blessing of another child & hopeful that now at 12 weeks I can start feeling better & be back to more like myself soon, (like today maybe :>)! I'm also grateful for patient kids who play really well together, while mommy hasn't been at her best, & a supportive husband & family who has stepped it up & helped me tons during the "fun" 1st trimester.

2 comments:

Heather Stott said...

yay for you guys and another baby!!! so excited for you!! Hope you get feeling better I am 10 weeks, only 2 behind you, and am in the "not fun stage" but mine lasts unusually longer then most peoples! :( so happy for you guys! you sure make gorgeous babies!

Dana said...

Congratulations!!! It's funny...I had a feeling you were expecting. So fun! Hope you're feeling better soon!